“Knowing yourself is the beginning of all wisdom.” ~ Aristotle
For so many of us life has changed radically over the last few months. This global pandemic has brought with it so much stress and uncertainty. We may be feeling that the ground is shifting under our feet as life as we know it has been completely disrupted and many of us may be searching for meaning in the storm. Indeed, we are all impacted by this powerful storm, though how we experience it depends on our boat. So much inequity is being highlighted in this crisis and we are witnessing and experiencing so much suffering and grief.
And even during this difficult time, there are also many unexpected blessings. One such blessing for me has been precious time with my family and another gift has been the deepening of my relationships with neighbors and friends. For those who have been able to or forced to pause, one blessing has been time for reflection. I have learned so much when I ask people to share what they have discovered about themselves through this crisis.
In a recent community conversation on Zoom, one older woman shared that she has found she can live on her own and thrive. When I asked her to share more about her discovery, she said she is an extrovert and that the shelter in place order has been very challenging leaving her feeling disconnected and isolated. Over time she discovered that she can reach out on Zoom and feel a real sense of connection with others that is so important to her. As a result, she is now scheduling a conversation with family and friends on Zoom every day.
This pandemic has provided an opportunity to reflect on what is truly important in our lives. In times of uncertainty we can either focus on what we have control of or what we do not.
Let’s make the deeply nurturing choice and focus on what we have control of – discovering what we value and hold dear. When we recognize what is truly important, we can then prioritize it in our lives. We can take this experience and allow it to inform how we live moving forward.
If we decide to prioritize what is truly important in our lives, the lessons from this pandemic will inspire us in living more authentically, aligned with our values, and with more peace, joy and meaning.
If you are wondering how to reconnect with what is important to you, I offer you the following five self-nurturing practices to support your process of discovery. These nurturing practices will empower you to discover what you value and cherish in your life.
Here are five ways to reconnect with what is important in your life:
1.Cultivate a Mindfulness Practice
Start by setting an intention to bring a spirit of curiosity and non-judgement to your life as you pay attention on purpose. Bringing mindfulness to how you feel, what you think, and the choices you make will provide you a tremendous amount of information about what is important to you. Whether you choose to meditate daily or bring your full attention to your conversations, drinking tea, or doing the dishes, you will discover so much more about yourself than you would living on auto-pilot. You may even find many simple joys and blessings already present in your life just waiting to be recognized and acknowledged.
2.Pause to Listen to Yourself Throughout the Day
Commit to pausing throughout the day to check in and listen to yourself. Sometimes in a crisis we can tend to focus outside ourselves, taking care of everyone else’s needs and forgetting about our own. If we do this for long enough, we may have difficulty identifying what we need or how we feel. Choosing to pause and listen to your self throughout the day will give you essential information about what is important to you and give you the opportunity to make nurturing choices along the way. You can use the STOP strategy to support you in this foundational practice of discovery- Stop. Take a Breath. Observe.Proceed.
3.Journal to Reflect and Deepen Your Self-Awareness
Journalling is such a powerful tool to learn about yourself. Spending time each day writing down your thoughts and feelings will help you clarify what is important to you. Each page will give you the opportunity to express yourself and process your experiences. As you read through the pages you can reflect and deepen your awareness of yourself and what is truly important to you. Choose to affirm, acknowledge and nurture yourself through the healing and transformative practice of journaling.
4.Develop Your Gratitude Practice
If you want to find out what is important to you develop a gratitude practice. Identifying what you are grateful for naturally highlights what is most important to you. Pause and write down three things you are grateful for in this moment. Are those things, people, and/or experiences you value and cherish? When you choose to nurture your gratitude practice, you will reconnect daily to what is important in your life, allowing you to acknowledge, honor, and celebrate it!
5.Give Yourself Permission to Prioritize What is Important to You
Once your become reconnected to what is important to you, give yourself permission to prioritize it in your life. If time with your family is important, put your cellphone down when you are with them and be fully present. If making the world a better place is important, volunteer at a food bank, reach out to an isolated friend or family member, and/or spread kindness and compassion every where you go. Whatever you identify as important, prioritize time in your day for those activities by putting it on your calendar. In these times of uncertainty, choose to be intentional with your time and make nurturing choices in alignment to what you hold dear.
As Brene Brown reminds us “Authenticity is a collection of choices that we have to make every day. It’s about the choice to show up and be real. The choice to be honest. The choice to let our true selves be seen.”
I would also include that it is the choice to prioritize what is truly important in our lives and cultivate the courage to do so. If this pandemic has taught us anything, it is that life is short and can change in a moment. Live your most authentic and beautiful life grounded in what is important to you.
May you give yourself permission to reconnect with what is important to you as you nurture peace in the world from the inside out!
Sending you so much peace, love and gratitude, Kelley
