“Practice isn’t the thing you do once you’re good. It’s the thing you do that makes you good.” ~Malcolm Gladwell
I love the feeling when inspiration meets motivation and propels me into a new way of being. This experience is particularly exciting when it comes to committing to a new self-nurturing practice. In the beginning of the process there is so much promise. We see the potential of the new practice to transform our lives and can’t wait to get started.
The self-nurturing practice may be consistent exercise, mindful eating, journaling, yoga, learning a new instrument, taking a class, being intentionally creative, meditating, treating ourselves with compassion, or anything that supports us in nourishing, cherishing, and encouraging our own growth and potential.
Generally, we start off strong and then over time our practice may ebb never turning into the nurturing habit we were hoping for. As a result, we may feel disappointed in ourselves and frustrated that our enthusiasm fizzled into apathy not realizing that if we nurtured ourselves into this new change, we would have been more successful. Being the artist of our own lives requires creativity, self-compassion, and a commitment to intentionally nurturing ourselves.
Here are five ways to transform the way you commit to a new self-nurturing practice in order to transform your life:
1. Identify a Practice. Spend some time getting clear about what self-nurturing practice you want to commit to. Check in with yourself and assess your level of motivation around making this commitment. Choose a self-nurturing practice you feel internally motivated about not something you think you “should” do. Visualize this practice becoming part of your day and explore what benefits you will experience when you consistently engage in the practice. Acknowledge your “why” or what will continue to motivate you to engage in this new practice, like vibrant health, inner peace, more joy or fun in your life, or any lasting feeling you will experience after the nurturing practice.
2. Set an Intention. When you have identified your self-nurturing practice and how it will benefit you, write an empowering intention about how you will engage in the practice and be specific. Your intention may look like “I will practice yoga two times per week to feel grounded, peaceful, and strong.” Be sure to include the benefits you will experience and how often you plan to engage in the practice so you feel encouraged and can hold yourself accountable. Create an intention that is inspiring and post it everywhere, on your mirror, in your wallet, on your refrigerator, in your car, by your bed, and as a screen saver on your phone.
3. Write Yourself a Permission Slip. Sometimes setting an intention is not enough and we have to literally give ourselves permission to prioritize ourselves when it comes to committing to a new self-nurturing practice. If you find yourself hesitating or feeling ambivalent about beginning this empowering process, write yourself a permission slip. Finish this statement, “I give myself permission to nurture myself by…” Then lean in and liberate yourself. Self-nurturing is not about perfection or another “to do” on your overflowing list, but rather nurturing the most important relationship you will ever have – the relationship with yourself. Giving yourself permission will clear away the resistance and open you to the possibility of really showing up for yourself like you would a dear friend.
As the Buddha reminds us, “You more than anyone in the entire universe deserves your love and affection.” Embrace the gifts of this new self-nurturing practice by giving yourself permission.
4. Schedule It In Your Planner. Whether you use a physical planner or the calendar on your phone, the next step is to schedule time for your new self-nurturing practice. Scheduling time for this practice is the most effective way to demonstrate that you are serious about nurturing yourself and will help you avoid the pitfall of taking care of everyone else first before attending to yourself. Scheduling time for this activity will reinforce that you are important and worth your love and attention and will support you in experiencing the benefits of the activity, which will fuel your continued motivation. Actually having it on your schedule will support you in building trust in yourself and making this practice a transformative part of your life. When you look at your calendar you can assess what time of day will be best to schedule your self-nurturing practice. You may find it helpful to get up 30 minutes early to nurture yourself or schedule your time later in the day or at lunch. Remember you can modify the specific time as you go but make it a point to have time scheduled in your calendar for the week ahead to allow your self-nurturing practice to take root in your life.
5. Acknowledge Your Progress. The final way to support yourself when committing to a new self-nurturing practice is to acknowledge your effort and progress. Just as you would do for a dear friend honor and celebrate yourself for committing to transforming your life through the art of self-nurturing. Recognizing your efforts will encourage you to continue your practice and focus on your growth and what you are grateful for. Remember this is about progress not perfection, so even if you missed a day, acknowledge what you have done to nurture yourself. As Stephen Covey reminds us,“Be patient with yourself. Self-growth is tender; it’s holy ground. There’s no greater investment.” Celebrate each and every time you have engaged in your new self-nurturing practice and allow your gratitude to follow acknowledging all the ways you have benefited. You have the power to be your most encouraging friend, so acknowledge your progress and growth.
May you feel empowered and excited to commit to a new self-nurturing practice as you nurture peace in the world from the inside out!
Sending you so much peace, love and gratitude, Kelley
