“You don’t understand,” my client Amy said to me. “I pinch areas of fat when I look in the mirror. I can’t ever imagine looking in the mirror and thinking that I’m beautiful.”
“I do understand,” I assured her. “I’ve been there. I had to heal my own body shame before I could help other women heal theirs.”
When clients first walk in my door, they, like Amy, are hopeless, desperate. They’ve been stuck in self-loathing and BodyShame for so long that the thought of liking, let alone loving, their bodies seems foreign. Yet, it is possible. I rediscovered the joy in my body and learned to love it again and you can too, I promise.
I want you to take a trip back in time to childhood – before you ever heard the words ‘fat’ or ‘muffin top’ or ‘supermodel,’ before you knew that you were ‘supposed’ to look a certain way and avoid certain foods to attain that look. One of my favorite images of me as a child is one where I am playing in my baby pool. I’ve got an ice cream cone in one hand, most of which is dripping down my hand, and I’m stomping in the water in my baby pool and laughing. Yes, I am ‘chubby’ – of course, no one has told me that yet – but the expression on my face is one of sheer delight. Delight in my body, my movement, my world.
What if you could capture that sense of joy again? What if you could look at your body, at the world, with that sense of awe and joy? Think it’s impossible? It’s not.
I want you to do something for yourself today, two things actually. First, I want you to explore your senses. For this exercise, you’ll need a place where you can be alone and undisturbed for a few minutes, your journal and something to write with. You’ll also need a bite of your favorite decadent food. For me, that would be something chocolate!
Get in a comfortable position and close your eyes. Now, I want you to feel. Feel the softness of your clothing against your skin, the cool air touching the exposed areas of your body, your breath moving in and out. With your eyes still closed, gently stretch – roll your shoulders, your neck, flex your feet and hands. Feel the deliciousness of this movement. Next, I want you to inhale and smell. What’s in the air? If you’re outside, maybe it’s the smell of sunshine or rain. If you’re inside, maybe it’s a whiff of your perfume or the dinner you have in the oven. Breathe in again. What can you detect this time?
Once you’ve smelled all there is to sense in your current environment, it’s time to move onto hearing. What sounds are coming to you? The sound of your breathing? The sounds of cars driving on the street in front of your house? The sounds of a mower clipping the grass in your neighbor’s lawn? Keep reaching out with your senses and see if you can pick up any new sounds. When you’re sure you’ve heard everything there is to hear, bring your concentration back to the sound of your breathing.
When you’re ready, open your eyes. What do you see? The walls of your house that you painted? Pictures of your loved ones? The chair you picked out last year? Look at everything in front of you as though you had never seen it before. What do you notice that you’d never paid attention to? The curve of the chair leg? The little nick in the upholstery? The place on the wall where the paint is chipped off just a smidge? Again, we are noticing, not judging. This is not the time to re-paint your walls!
Now, it’s time to explore your sense of taste. Reach out and pick up your chosen morsel of decadence. Look at it. What does it look like? Note its color, texture, brightness. Now close your eyes. Run your finger across the top of it. What does it feel like? Is it soft? Hard? Mushy? Bring it to your nose and inhale. How does it smell? What can you detect? A hint of cinnamon? The pungency of raspberries? When you are ready, take a bite. Do not chew yet. Just let the food sit on your tongue. What do you taste? Which flavors are most prominent? What does it feel like sitting on your tongue? When you’re ready, begin to chew. Stop every few chews and ask those same questions again: What do you taste? Which flavors are most prominent? What does it feel like sitting on your tongue? How has it changed with chewing? When you’re ready, swallow the bite of food. Follow the sensations as it goes down your throat. Repeat with the next bite, savoring each bite until you are done. Now sit and breathe. What flavors linger on your tongue? Any sensations? Any smells?
When you are ready, open your eyes. Grab your journal and jot down any insights you received during that experience. How did it feel? Was it awkward? Enjoyable? There is no judgement here, merely report out what you experienced.
Now, as you are in this relaxed, open frame of mind, I want you to do the second part of your ‘homework.’ I want you to start a Body Gratitude List. Here’s the thing: your body is a miracle. You look in the mirror and see flaws. But in reality, your body is an amazing creation of the Divine. Every single day your body performs necessary functions to keep you alive, things you never even have to think about. Your body breathes for you, your heart beats and pumps blood to all of your cells, you grow new cells each day as your body destroys the ones that aren’t working correctly any more. Your skin repairs itself – that scar on your cheek that you despise? It’s better than having the wound there still, yes? Your body manufactures hormones and other chemical messengers to ensure all of this happens right on schedule. It digests your food, converting it to blood sugar so you have energy to get through your day and the rest to fat so you have a stored source of energy on the days that you get busy and miss lunch. It dilates your pupils to adjust to the lighting in the room where you sit. It regulates your body’s temperature and blood pressure depending on your exertion level and environmental conditions. It allows you to move – to walk, to talk, to dance, to sing, to play. Pretty amazing when you think about it, huh?
[Tweet “Maybe, just maybe, it’s time to say these words to your body: “Thank you.” Dr. @MaryePritchard”]
