Women are nurturers by nature; it’s in our DNA. And although much has changed through the course of evolution, the female nurturing instinct has not. It’s not a bad thing, mind you. After all, without this instinct, the human race might have already been extinct. However, over the course of time, women have taken on increased responsibility. As a result, self-care often slips.
As nurturers, we take care of those around us. We take care of who and what are important in our lives. When we are constantly giving, the question is how are we recharging? How are we refilling our spiritual vessel?
Why self-care is critical
When we are always in a state of giving, and we don’t find ways to recharge or do anything for ourselves, we become hollow inside. Over time, there’s nothing left to give. We’re exhausted, lost our enthusiasm; we become forgetful, sad, or depressed. We feel emotional volatile and short-tempered. We fall into bed at night for a few hours of sleep, and then we start all over the next morning.
The big question is, how can we really love others and care for others as deeply as we want if we’re living in this state of constant distress and emptiness?
We can’t!
So, the premise is simple: The more we love ourselves, care for ourselves, celebrate ourselves; then the more capable we are to love, care, and celebrate those we care for.
Three Easy Steps for Putting Yourself First
1) Carve Out Precious Time for You
Financial consultants always tell clients to reward themselves first, by putting aside money to fund fun activities or purchases. Self-care works the same way. When you are planning your calendar for the week, allocate time for YOU first. Even a quiet walk during an office break, or a catnap if you work from home, is a great way to make yourself a priority. At least once a week give yourself a special treat, like a Mani Pedi or a massage.
2) Practice Receiving
Self-love is about receiving. It is about being open to acknowledgement and validation that we are worthy. When we love ourselves, then we can receive from others — not as a form of self-validation and worthiness — but rather as a gift, an offering of love, appreciation.
In relationships, you must be open to receive. You must know your self-worth, relish your value. So, when gives love to you, you are open to receive.
Think of it like an electrical circuit. Electricity is constantly flowing. The word circuit comes from the Latin word circuitous — meaning to go around. What comes around, goes around. Yin and Yang.
There is no such thing as a one-way current – it is either circuitous or nonexistent. That’s how important it is to be able to give and receive.
3) Deepen Your Spiritual Practice
We all have a divine wisdom within, whether you call it soul, goddess, or spirit. It exists, it is constant, and it can be called upon to guide us. Connecting requires only that we quieten the mind, turn inward, and seek what lay within. Deepening your spiritual practice simple means making more time to connect with your inner wisdom. Whether signing up for a gentle yoga session or creating a home practice to sit on your cushion each day, turning inward can provide a heightened sense of calm and connectedness with the world around you.
Personal Reflection
If you have the tell-tale signs that your vessel is empty, how can you practice self-care? How committed are you to loving yourself first, so that you can better love those around you?
