Art. It can be defined as the expression of human imagination producing works to be appreciated for their beauty and emotional power.
Typically, we think of art as that which piques our senses: paintings, sculpture, music, dance. Poetry and even cooking are considered Art. If art is also an expression, then there is Art in accepting appreciation. There is Art in expressing thanks and there is Art in Giving ~ especially in giving support.
Woman throughout history have had the role of giver and nurturer in many societies. We have been asked to give support in so many ways. To this day, women fulfill this first in their giving support to our families. We give this support through making a home and providing nourishment of all kings. Women give support in our communities ~ at work and those at large. We lend extra help. We volunteer. We nurture these communities through this support.
And, too, women give support to other women. We provide friendship. We help colleagues on projects at work beyond the expectations of them and we car pool children. From the day to day needs of support to the support needed at times of crisis, we are there for our sacred friends. We give and lend support instinctively.
The most sacred way we give support to another woman is through these bonds of friendships. We develop deep, heart to heart friendships, where laughter and giggles happen. These are the sacred friendships where our deepest desires, fears and challenges are fully expressed. Every day these friendships develop, are nurtured and continue.
These sacred friendships are based upon mutual support. We give seemingly unconditionally. There is an Art in Giving this support.
The art of giving support has three essential aspects to it: The ability to hold sacred space, the ability to believe in another and the ability to shine your own light.
1. The Ability to Hold Sacred Space
When we have friendships, we typically attract like-minded friends. Those who hold and follow the same beliefs and principles as we do. But, no two people have walked the same path and will face similar challenges. Each of us will be confronted with different challenges. Each of us will handle these differently.
Supporting a friend is about creating and holding sacred space where they can express their deepest concern without judgment. This kind of support is offered by being able to look at things with an open mind, without imposing our opinions and beliefs. This kind of support is offered with patience.
Dr. Wayne Dyer said “If you change the way you look at things, the things you look at will change”. Holding sacred space for a friend requires keeping an open mind. This requires us to be able to look at things from a different perspective. As a supporter of a sacred friendship like this, we must be willing to look at a situation through many lenses most especially those of one’s friend so that the best possible outcome can be seen and the best possible choice can be made by them.
Holding Sacred Space of Support also requires patience. While a choice and the steps needed to implement that choice may seem obvious, patience is required as a sacred friend makes their own determination. Patience is a necessary reminder that as a sacred supporter, it is our obligation to not judge, not impose our own personal beliefs and not to create expectations on what should be done and when it should be done.
2. Ability to Believe in Others
Yes, we have faith, trust and confidence in our sacred friends. We believe in their abilities, we trust in their following their own heart’s desires. We have faith in them. At a recent TEDx Talk, Joshua Encarnacion spoke about redefining the way we believe in people. He suggests that we support others unselfishly. This is true. By shifting our support from faith, trust and confidence in another to giving them empowerment, encouragement and engagement, we become unselfish in supporting another.
By holding sacred space and by shining love onto our sacred friends, we are able to inspire and empower them. We empower our sacred friends to step into their own light and take courageous steps forward based upon their own inner compass. Yes, belief is a powerful element of the Art of Supporting and when we encourage, empower and engage with loving support, our sacred friends are able to ignite their lives and passions. They are able to hear their own soul’s speak to them and make choices for their highest good.
3. Ability to Shine Your Own Light
Yes, the sacred art of supporting involves our shining their own light at times when a friend has challenges shining their own. There are two ways we must shine their own light.
The first is act of supporting by shining ones’ own light is about spreading love over sacred friends. It is about showering love that is within us over them. It is about sending it to them without hesitation, without condition and without reservation. Allowing this shower of love, that holds no judgment and that gives strength will be felt by them even when we are not present. When one is surrounded by love of this kind, (is there any other?), one can take the courageous action that they inherently know they must take.
The second way of supporting a sacred friend by shining one’s own light to master the art of giving support is to shine our own light and take courageous steps forward in our own passions and pursuits. It is stepping into and becoming the best version of ourselves. When one needs support, it can often come from seeing, watching, feeling and celebrating the successes of others.
How many of our sacred friends look to successful woman for inspiration? We look to the woman of empowerment that we all know such as Oprah. One also looks to those in their own circles, who have stepped into and who are stepping into their own brilliance, for inspiration. As a sacred and trusted friend, we need to continue to do this for our friends. It is empowering and supportive.
It does no help to diminish the light shining on us, to pursue our passions a bit less, and to hide successes from our friends. This serves no one and hinders light and love. We must shine our own light by sending love to our friends and by continuing the passionate pursuit of our own desires and dreams to be the best support for them.
Following our passions and pursuing allows our light to shine. It is the beams of light we spread when being true to ourselves that ultimately spreads love. That is truly one of the greatest ways to give support to our sacred friends. There is no truer way to practice the Art of Supporting then by doing that which we are meant to for the highest good of all.
