When overwhelmed and gripped with strong emotion, do you wonder, “How will I get through the day?” While stress is a natural part of life, sometimes it feels too much to bear. Especially if you experienced a painful childhood, today’s stress can trigger trauma-based physical sensations, such as anxiety and panic, that keep the past alive in your body. In this overwhelming state, you may feel helpless and frightened. But take heart. Here’s a beautiful practice I developed to help you restore balance to your mind and body and feel less alone in your struggles.
Sacred Shawl Practice
In religious and spiritual traditions, the shawl—often used while praying—represents comfort and spiritual shelter. Drawing from this centuries-old tradition, I created the “Sacred Shawl Practice” to help you calm your body and nervous system and feel grounded in the loving arms of your Wise Self.
Who is your Wise Self? She’s the part of you that remains unaffected by the stress and strain in your life or by the effects of early trauma, loves you unconditionally, and is ever-present. You may think of your Wise Self as your Higher Power, God, Spirit, or Consciousness. I’ll be using the term Wise Self, but use whatever term inspires you.
The “Sacred Shawl Practice” calls forth your Wise Self to help you feel supported and to lessen fear and worry. Knowing you’re held in the arms of divine love, you begin to feel protected and reassured.
Think of your body as a container. It’s holding stress and tension, and trauma-based sensations you may have experienced in childhood that get triggered today. Physical touch and hugs, even when you give them to yourself, can calm stress in the body. Wrapping yourself in your sacred shawl helps reassure your nervous system in the same way a fretful baby feels comforted and secure when swaddled and held in their parent’s arms. Here’s what you do:
1. Select your shawl.
Look for a beautiful shawl in whatever fabric and pattern you desire. It could be as simple as cotton, as fancy as silk, or a heavier wool. What matters is that you are drawn to it and it’s comfortable to wear indoors. Instead of a shawl, you may prefer to use a shirt, sweater, or even a throw or blanket. I’ll refer to shawl, but any garment covering your torso works. Perhaps you already own a special shawl or sweater to use. If not, buy something beautiful just for this purpose.
2. Bless your shawl.
Give yourself about thirty minutes of quiet, uninterrupted time in a private space. Sit in a comfortable chair or cross-legged on a cushion if you prefer.
Wrap your sacred shawl around you and gently wrap your arms around your torso giving yourself a hug. Close your eyes and breathe deeply for a moment to calm your mind and settle your body.
Then, say the following prayer silently to yourself or out loud. This prayer invokes the energy and support of your Wise Self. Allow this support to flow through you and your shawl. As you pray, imagine being held in the arms of love.
Dear Wise Self (or Higher Power, God, Spirit),
May this shawl be blessed with your love and support.
When I feel weak, help me feel strong.
When I feel scared, help me feel grounded.
When I feel worried, help me feel peace.
May I feel safe and secure in the shelter of your loving embrace.
Thank you.
After you say your prayer, sit quietly for a moment. Notice what it’s like to feel embraced in your Wise Self’s loving presence. Breathe in that energy. Imagine your shawl is infused with this love.
After you bless your sacred shawl with this prayer, you don’t need to say it again. Once the loving energy of your Wise Self is invoked, it’s always present. But if repeating the prayer deepens your experience, by all means repeat this process. Start with this prayer as a template but you may choose to use phrases that best resonate with you.
3. Wear Your Shawl
Whenever you put on your sacred shawl, repeat these three affirmations: I am calm. I am wise. I am peace. These words help you open to receive the loving energy of your Wise Self and embody these qualities. You can use these affirmations or choose others that work best for you.
Store your sacred shawl respectfully and keep it visible and readily available to wear. For example, you could lay it on the side of a chair, in a basket, or place it on an open shelf. You may also want to bring it to work or social events. The beauty of a shawl is that it’s a great fashion accessary and no one knows its deeper meaning. For variety and accessibility, you may want to create several sacred shawls so that some can be for private settings and others taken anywhere.
Here are some suggestions for when to wear your sacred shawl:
- When stressed and overwhelmed: Wear your sacred shawl when you feel anxious, worried, sad, or lonely. Sit quietly, while taking deep and gentle breaths, until you feel settled and soothed.
- Take it to work: When feeling stressed, put on your shawl to ground yourself.
- Deepen moments of self-care: For example, take a ten-minute break and sip a cup of herbal tea while wearing your shawl. Or wear it while reading a book, listening to music, or catching up with a close friend on the phone.
Think of your sacred shawl as a spiritual embrace that helps soothe hard feelings, calms your nervous system, and also enhances times you already feel settled. Receiving comfort isn’t only for stressful times. Much like a child enjoys snuggling with a loving parent simply to feel connected, give yourself regular moments of connection with your Wise Self too. The more you use your sacred shawl, the more ways you’ll discover how comforting it is. Imagine knowing that helping yourself feel safe and secure, and feeling your Wise Self’s love, is only a hug away.
© 2024. Diane Petrella, MSW. This article is excerpted and adapted from Healing Emotional Eating for Trauma Survivors: Trauma-Informed Practices to Nurture a Peaceful Relationship with Your Emotions, Body, and Food. Oakland: CA. New Harbinger Publications.
