If you’re like most folks, you may think, “I have all these big dreams, but I never accomplish them. Maybe I don’t have anything of value to contribute to the world, and no one would care anyway.”
What will it take for you to live like you mean it?
If you’re like me, you may have noticed that most people only really ask themselves this question when they are faced with a life-threatening illness.
But here’s the thing:
We’ve All Got a Terminal Condition
My mom was diagnosed with breast cancer about 10 years ago.
By the time the surgeon operated, it had already spread to her axillary lymph nodes, which made her prognosis pretty grim.
She asked her oncologist if she was going to die. The doctor responded, “Well, no more so than we all are.” My mom said she really needed to hear that, and I think we all do.
Not one of us is going to live forever (not in our current physical form anyway). So the question really is, “How am I going to live like I mean it?”
We only have so much time in the day, and we only have so much energy. If we want to live our lives to the fullest, we need to see our lives through that terminal lens.
Life is precious – and much too short to waste.
I’ve found that by adopting an attitude of purposeful perseverance I accomplish more of my dreams and truly live life like I mean it.
It’s all about deciding what you most want to do with your life and then going for it with all your might.
Developing Purposeful Perseverance – My Story
“It’s not that I’m so smart, it’s just that I stay with problems longer.” – Albert Einstein
When I decided I wanted to become a nurse-midwife over 20 years ago, I wasn’t even a nurse. In fact, on the East Coast, where I live, there were only two universities that accepted students without previous obstetric nursing experience.
I applied to both of these programs and was summarily rejected. It took me 4 attempts before I was finally accepted (fourth time’s a charm!) and I was offered a scholarship to attend Yale, which I ultimately chose.
When I arrived for my first meeting with my professors they all knew me as the applicant who wouldn’t give up. One of my professors said she coined a term just for me. She said I exemplified “purposeful perseverance.”
I want you to exemplify purposeful perseverance, too. No matter what you want in life – you need to direct your energy toward setting your mind to your goal and sticking with it.
Adopting Purposeful Perseverance – Your Story
The following series of steps, adapted from Napoleon Hill’s Think and Grow Rich, will help you deal with your “terminal condition” and create the purposeful perseverance mindset. I’ve provided my answers for inspiration.
1. Have a definite purpose, backed by a definite desire.
I wanted to be a nurse-midwife because I loved the idea of caring for women and children. The birth process fascinated me then – and still does!
2. Create a definite plan expressed by definite action – even if they only involve one-minute actions!
I would apply to direct-entry midwifery schools on the east coast—even if the only schools that met those criteria seemed impossible to get into. And I would keep applying and acting on my desires until I got in.
3. If you experience any negative or discouraging messages from others, try to understand that your desire is creating some discomfort for them and do not take it personally.
I got plenty of discouraging messages—even apart from the two summary rejections and the spot on the waiting list. My favorite negative/discouraging response when I told people what I was doing was: “Is it even legal to be a midwife?
4. Have a friendly alliance with one or more persons who will encourage you to follow through with both plan and purpose.
I talked to everyone I knew who was a midwife and willing to talk with me. I made friends among the undergraduates in my nursing program as well as the non-traditional students, and got to know their dreams and goals. And when I at last met my peers in my midwifery program I felt like I had found my long-lost tribe. I got so much support that inspired and sustained me that I know for sure that I would not have been able to make it without them.
With these four steps, you can get clear on what you want to do with your precious life energy and create an attitude of purposeful perseverance. We’ve all got a terminal condition – but we can all choose to live like we mean it.
Post-script: I mention my mom in this post. She has now been cancer-free for the last 9 years and living every day like she means it!
Thank you for the encouraging words. They ring so true for my stage of life and breast cancer survivor experience. Hail to your mom and all the warriors out there.
Hello dear Mary!
Thanks so much for your kind comment! (I’m so sorry I didn’t respond sooner — I wasn’t alerted to it as I expected to be.)
One of my greatest joys is connecting with other women survivors who are now THRIVING and it absolutely makes my day to know that my words rang true for you.
Hail to you, Mary — YOU are an amazing warrior woman!!