Over the years, I have witnessed in my real estate business that relationships matter. Not keeping your business and your personal life separate can actually make for a “whole” person and fulfilled life. It’s part of the lifestyle. We can be our authentic self. There’s no fake it until you make it. I can be my full self. The authentic me. The people in my circle know me and want to be in my circle and my energy.
Being in business as an introvert can have its challenges. One thing that is true for most introverts is we have deep relationships with people and we care deeply. This is where you can shine. Whether you are just starting out or want to grow your business, cultivating and nurturing deep relationships is the path to creating your own success (whatever that looks like for you).
Who is part of your circle? That is your decision. You can choose who is in your circle. You can be the one to build relationships that matter with the people that reflect your greater purpose. When you look at who is already in your circle, think about the characteristics of the people. Do you value particular character traits like those who are trustworthy, helpful, giving, fun, supportive, introspective, open thinking? What are the top three characteristics of your current circle of people?
Remember those top characteristics when you meet new people and are considering adding them to your circle. Always be open to inviting people that would benefit from being part of your circle. You are always open to inviting more like-minded people into your circle.
When you connect with someone, how do you know they have values or characteristics that you are looking for? Ultimately, you have to get to know them! Building and nurturing relationships does take time, these things do not happen overnight. The following questions will help you to get to know others.
Connection Questions:
- Tell me a little bit about yourself.
- What hobbies do you have?
- I’m reading _____. Have you read it? This is what I’ve gotten out of it so far.
- If they have a business: What are you most passionate about in your business?
- How can I help or support you?
If you meet up with someone who is not aligned or they seem a little off but you’re not sure what it is, trust your gut. Trust your intuition. That person may not be a terrible person, but if it doesn’t feel right, they are not someone to invite into your circle.
When you are moving through the process of growing your circle, keep your values, mission, and passion in mind as you are meeting people. Having this at the forefront of your mind will help you weed out the people who are not aligned with you and are not meant to be part of your circle.
Friendships are such an important part of your circle and your community. Creating and nurturing your community of people sets you up for growing your business while nourishing your soul and other people. Over the years, I have met so many women just by showing up and interacting with them. Many of the ones that ended up in my circle over a decade ago are still part of my life and business.
Building a few deep connections rather than many shallow relationships will fill you up. These are the people who will encourage you when you’re struggling. They will help you plant the seeds and grow your business by being your biggest cheerleader. They will turn to you when they need encouragement, referrals and refer people to you. These relationships are mutually beneficial. You have heard of win-win. Well, this is win-win-win because everyone benefits! Everyone is elevated by the connection and relationship.
Do you value connections, relationships, referrals, working together, elevating one another, win-win-win scenarios? This way of doing business has shown me that going deep in my relationships and connections with people conserves my energy, reaps more business, more income, and I get to spend the most time with the people I care about and want to give value to.
The concept of Go Deep, Not Wide was created to teach and guide people to grow a referral-based business. Here’s the concept. Going wide is always hustling to meet as many new people as possible and growing a large or wide list of connections. This isn’t necessarily bad, but it does set you up for lots of shallow relationships, depleted energy, and increased expenses.
For an introvert, having a lot of shallow-level relationships is not energy-giving, it is energy-draining because we thrive in deeper relationships with people. There is only so much energy that you can give as an introvert. Spending our time wisely, like with the people in our circle, not only conserves our energy but in some cases may even increase an introvert’s energy.
“It’s so important to have people around you that lift you up and that you can lift up too.”
Surround yourself with the most amazing people that totally get you, your business, and want to support you in every way including blossoming friendships. These people have missions and visions that help and support their clients, their community and their message is spreading throughout the world. It’s an opportunity to link arms with other introverted women entrepreneurs on their journey and be there to support each other.
