Ah… happiness. It’s one of life’s ironies that an experience so sought after by virtually every human being means something entirely different to each one of us. For some, the word is synonymous with safety, security, and peace of mind. For others, it’s measured by the presence of passion and adventure. Throughout our entire lives we all cobble together notions of what happiness means to us, refined through shared experiences with lovers, children and friends. Meanwhile, at the same time we are forming our own ideas, the media and popular culture offer us ready-made definitions of happiness that at some level we feel compelled to accept. With so many conflicting viewpoints about what happiness is, is it any wonder that so many find it difficult to attain?
With the women I coach, I am noticing that an overwhelming majority are coming to understand how attaching our happiness to an external condition – having the right car, the right house, the right man, for example – is a sure recipe for disappointment. After all, one dent in the prized new car; one turn in the market that brings down the equity of the house; one forgotten birthday or anniversary, and we are confronted with the fact that the joy we derive from these things is sourced from outside of ourselves, and is therefore unsustainable.
What I’d like to suggest is that there is a deeper reason that happiness can feel so elusive and fleeting, and this is because we’ve been trained to define it as a single emotion – as a feeling of accomplishment, of passion, of desire, of relaxation… or as any one of a thousand other sensations. The fact is that no one emotion can capture the experience we call happiness, for the simple reason that “happiness” is not an emotion at all. The state we call happiness is created when the energy that sources our body, mind and emotions is unobstructed by resistance and therefore free to move at a frequency that is high and fast. What we label as happiness is nothing more than feeling the sensation of our own energy body being unbounded and free.
Thanks to both quantum physics and modern science, it’s now a well-accepted fact that energy – not matter – is the primary substance that comprises everything that exists in the universe. Even things that our senses tell us are solid– rocks, mountains, trees, and flesh-and-bone human beings – are made up entirely of energy. Anytime the energy of our thoughts, feelings and actions is expressed without resistance, we register this experience as one of being “happy.” This explains why happiness can be defined in so many ways – sometimes as passion; other times as peace – all are aspects of our inner being, and when they are given free reign, joy is the natural result. So, how can we deliberately foster within ourselves a state of being in which happiness flows as a natural result? By activating the Law of Allowing.
Allowing is our natural state. It’s the way we’re all born when we enter the world – pliable, receptive, deserving, and open to every possible expression of well-being, abundance, happiness and joy. In its free and unobstructed state, our body-mind system is in direct connection and communion with the unlimited energy and inspiration of the universe; it flows through us like water rushes through an open pipe.
When we are allowing the full expression of who we are to be expressed in any given moment of time, every aspect of us is enhanced. Physically, we feel alive and vibrant; our senses are keen and we are open to connection and pleasurable experiences. Mentally, our creativity and problem-solving abilities are heightened. Emotionally, we feel free, unencumbered, exhilarated. Seen within this broader context, choosing happiness has literally nothing to do with seeking out experiences that provide a temporary feel-good or striving to achieve a certain status. It is instead a purely energetic shift that we affect within the matrix of our own mind-body system. It’s the act of deliberately raising our vibration so that our energy field moves at a rate that is higher, faster, and unobstructed.
So, is it possible to “choose” happiness? You bet – anywhere, anytime, and in the midst of any circumstance! All you need to do is gradually raise the frequency of your own energy system. Start with whatever feels easy. Read something that inspires you. Think a thought that motivates you. Recall an experience that floods you with love. Reach out to someone to express gratitude or appreciation. Watch a movie that makes you laugh. In the words of the non-physical teachers Abraham-Hicks, “reach for whatever feels good.” Rather than focusing on experiencing happiness as a particular emotion, focus on simply opening up the energy field of your mind and body. When you do, happiness – in whatever form you most desire it – will find you.
