Fear. It’s an insidious little bugger, isn’t it?
If we look at what predominant emotion is imbedded in our society, guiding our lives, even though we would like it to be love, sadly, it is fear.
What role does fear play in your life? Does it hold you back or limit you? How much control does it have? Now of course, in a moment of danger, fear plays an important role. It keeps us alert to our surroundings. It pours adrenaline into the body and engages the fight or flight response from the nervous system, which helps us to take action for our safety. It also helps us to pay attention and be cautious, avoiding situations that may put us at risk.
Once the situation has past, the fear should subside as the mind realizes the danger has past and it is safe. But quite often this fear becomes stuck in the body. It is such a powerful emotion. Either the fear grabs onto the body, or the body holds onto the fear, it really doesn’t matter which since the result is the same. The fear can stay in the body long after the situation has past, often it stays for many years or even the rest of one’s life if not specifically released and healed.
Why do we hold onto fear?
Here are four common reasons for holding fear in the body:
- Protection. We hold onto fear as a layer of armor against anything that may harm us. This fear may not even be related to the perceived danger. It often generalizes against anything it perceives as adverse or dangerous.
- Habit. After experiencing several fearful occurrences, the body becomes programmed to react in fear every time, whether it is warranted or not. Fear becomes the go-to response to all situations.
- Reminder. Fear can also be held as a reminder to not make the same mistakes or allow the same things to happen again.
- Forgotten storage. During times of overwhelming emotion, the body has an amazing ability to close off the emotion, contain it within the body where it can’t be felt and doesn’t need to be dealt with. This helps a person to cope in the aftermath of trauma and is very effective. The person, however, is not consciously aware of this container of fear, and doesn’t realize all that it is holding onto it until the held emotion starts to cause other problems later on.
What happens to the body when it holds fear?
The armor of fear may be beneficial in the immediate period after a traumatic event, but in the years since, it becomes more harmful to the body than it is helpful. It develops into a barrier to feeling and experiencing any life beyond fear. The armor grows so thick and impenetrable that it not only keeps out danger, but it also blocks love, joy, peace and the emotions we need most. This happens gradually over time, without the body and mind even being aware of it.
The body, as it holds fear, becomes tense and rigid. It is unable to relax, and has difficulty moving and stretching. The muscles that clenched at the time of fear, often get stuck in the pattern of tension, and remain that way unable to soften or let go. This constant state of contraction often leads to injuries, as the muscles are no free to move or stretch as they need to.
The fear that has been sealed off and hidden in the body can also elicit emotional responses later. The forgotten emotions in the box become pressurized and can erupt unexpectedly, usually triggered by some smaller event. The fear is usually out of proportion to the trigger, and difficult for the person to understand. They wonder where this reaction came from, since it seemed to come out of nowhere. Emotions can also bubble up, coming to the surface a little at a time. These may be a little easier to deal with, but still need attention and effort to get to the source of the fear.
The deeply held emotions hidden away in the body can also fester and cause disease. Healing and preventing disease are the main reasons it is so important to find ways to express your emotions in a healthy way, and also clear away the old baggage. But even when dealing with illness, clearing and healing the old fears can help the body to heal faster, more completely, and keep it from recurring.
What happens if fear takes over?
When fear resides in the body, it likes to control everything. It takes over the mind, behavior, beliefs, actions and decisions, and dominates the emotions. Take a moment to notice how prevalent fear is in your life. When making a decision, what are your first thoughts? Is it about what could go wrong? The what-ifs, the worries, the but-you-cants, and other endless loops of negative self-talk that play in your head. These are all produced by fear, in an effort to manipulate your choices and keep you imprisoned.
I recently took a deep look within myself, spending a lot of time dissecting my decisions, beliefs and emotions. I was really taken aback by how much of it was dominated by fear. How could I have let this happen without realizing it? That’s the thing, it happens so gradually, and for a necessary purpose to protect us, that we don’t notice how it stealthily hi-jacks our entire way of being.
Here’s a meditation you can use when you feel overwhelmed by fear:
A Meditation for Clearing and Healing Fear
- Take a deep breath to ground and center, and also connect to the divine (whatever that is for you) to create a safe sacred space for healing.
- Bring your awareness into your body, asking for your fear to come forward.
- Focus your attention on that area of your body that is holding fear. How does it feel? Notice all of the sensations, physically and emotionally, associated with this fear. Does the fear still serve a purpose for you, or are you ready to let it go?
- Now bring love and light to surround the fear. Thank the fear for how it has protected you all this time.
- Ask the fear if it has any message for you, anything that you need to acknowledge or understand before it can be cleared from you.
- Give your body permission to soften and allow the fear to be released. Envision the fear moving out of your body and being taken away to be transformed. If you feel resistance, ask to know what that might be, that it may be healed as well. Take all the time you need.
- Feel the gentle warmth of healing light flow through your body, bringing healing to all the space where the fear used to be. Fill that space and your entire being with whatever you need to heal, nourish and sustain you. Love, light, joy, peace…allow it to fill your body, mind, heart and soul.
- Feel gratitude for all you have received, sending love, light and gratitude all around you.
It is never too late to take back your power. You don’t have to be controlled by fear. It may take some time to reprogram your thinking and remind yourself that you don’t need to react in fear and can adopt a new way. Love yourself enough to heal your fear and take control of your life. You can do this!
“Nothing in life is to be feared, it is only to be understood. Now is the time to understand more, so that we may fear less.” ~ Marie Curie
