Excuses are really just cleverly disguised fear-based thoughts. When we tell ourselves, “Oh, I don’t have enough money for that goal,” what we are really saying is “I fear that I won’t have enough to pay my bills if I spend my money on that other thing.” Many times we do not even realize our decisions are based on fear.
Think about a situation in your life when you wanted to do something, but you didn’t. For me, this has happened a lot. For example, when I was working in the advertising agencies, I was so miserable, the thought of sitting in front of a computer all day chipped away at me like having Jenga blocks being removed from the tower. The longer I stayed in that environment, the more unpredictable and shaky I became. I desperately wanted to leave the corporate world, but I kept telling myself I didn’t know what I would do for work if I left advertising.
The fear of not knowing where my next paycheck was going to come from stepped in and prevented me from following my heart. I believed that I had to work to make a living so I could pay my bills. I stayed uncomfortably rooted in this vicious cycle. I would look through the window at work and wish I were playing outside. My mind would wander to far-off exotic lands and loving thoughts of all of my deepest desires until I snapped back into reality,
I would realize I felt trapped in my current environment, but there was nothing I could do; at least that is how it felt. The thought pattern that kept repeating in my mind was that I didn’t have enough money to support myself on another type of salary. What I didn’t realize was, that what was circulating around in my head were really just fear-based thoughts repeating themselves. My biggest fear was not having enough, and it manifested into many different aspects of my life. For example, I often found myself overeating well past the time I was full because subconsciously I feared there was not enough to go around. It was difficult to share with boyfriends, because I feared there wouldn’t be enough for me. There was never enough money, enough time, or enough energy. What I really feared was the need to be recognized because I secretly feared that I was not enough.
It is a journey to the heart to discover that you are the source of your own happiness and sadness. Everything in your life is there to help you learn, but, more importantly, everything in you life is there because you put it there. This may be a hard concept to grasp at first, but hang in there for a moment and stay with me. Entertain the idea that life is exactly what we make of it, and every single thing in our existence is there because our higher self or greater good wants us to grow, learn, and appreciate it. When we grow we expand, and when we expand we connect closer to our true self, so naturally when we take on new challenges, or take steps to activating our goals, the little voice in our heads, the fear, gets insanely louder.
It screams at us, “Whoa! Warning! Warning! This is uncharted territory!” When we listen to that voice, it keeps us playing small. It keeps us from doing what we were made todo. We all have a right to stand up for ourselves and be, what we are supposed to be but when we listen to the negative voices in our heads we sell ourselves short and stay in a mediocre, static state.
You always have the choice to listen to the loving, kind voice in your head, or repeat the same negative thought patterns. The human brain can hold one conscious thought at a time, so let’s choose a positive thought.
It is our duty to push through the fear and get to the other side. The funny thing about fear is, when we actually look at it dead in the eyes, and say, “Fear, I see you and I am pushing through,” it isn’t as scary as it looked before we addressed it.
©2013. Shannon Kaiser. The above is an excerpt from Find Your Happy: An Inspirational Guide to Loving Life to Its Fullest.
