Learning how to center and ground ourselves spiritually means that we are building the inner musculature to be able to withstand any storm. Think of this as your core foundation, which you choose to build on solid rock rather than sand. When we center ourselves in this way, we become stronger, more present, aware, and balanced. Life flows more naturally without force or strain. We experience our minds as clear rather than cluttered, and our spirit feels free and certain rather than restricted and confused. Here are some practices to get to that elevated state.
Reframe What It Means to “Let It Go”
When we’re feeling out of sorts and confide in a trusted friend or family member about something that’s bothering us, they’ll often try to help by advising us to just “let it go.” But it’s not that easy. Yes, great, I would love that, we may think, but how exactly do I do that?
We usually know when we need to “let it go,” but what if we aren’t quite ready or we are really stinking mad and need to sit with those feelings for a minute? Sometimes someone suggesting we just “let it go” seems a little harsh and angers us even more.
Being human means people will annoy and upset us, circumstances and situations will disappoint us, and we will be left feeling powerless at times. But we don’t have to stay stuck. We can lean back into a more elevated, empowered state. We can feel calm and tranquil. We can trust we are on the right path and everything is happening for the greatest good for all.
When something upsets me, instead of telling myself to let it go, I now say, Please take this from me. This phrase means surrendering our stress, frustration, disappointment, or whatever is troubling us to the God of our own understanding. This may look something like, Wow, I am really judging this person; please take this from me. Or, I am freaking out about whether I am going to get this job/relationship/money; please take this from me.
Acknowledging the presence of a higher power reminds us that we are never alone and are always being guided and protected. When we are fearful, we have forgotten this and are relying on our strength alone. Let the universe assist you. It’s a simple way to take back your power.
Acknowledge Your Resistance and Attachments
Some time ago, I received feedback from a potential client that initially felt disappointing. My knee-jerk reaction was, I don’t want to do it that way. I shouldn’t have to jump through these hoops. When I stepped back from the experience and realized how resistant I was to this expert’s feedback, I felt a big shift. I was then able to interpret the feedback as a valuable gift — information that could be used to my advantage to make me a more attractive candidate, not just to this client but to all clients. It also motivated me to take inspired action and create a series of online courses designed to help others create more fulfilling and purpose-driven lives.
I also recognized that I was resisting the spiritual principle listed above and trusting solely in myself, instead of allowing a higher power to guide me. I needed to trust that this “rejection” was actually a good thing, leading me to an even better opportunity.
Having a forward-facing career certainly means experiencing more than the average share of rejection, and through these challenges I’ve learned that the “road closures” of our lives are not by accident. The failure, the rejection, the loss of a job are all big detour signs with flashing lights saying, “Stop! You’re going the wrong way! Turn around!”
Sometimes we are forced down a new road. We may not know exactly where we are going at first. We resist the unfamiliar terrain. But we must face the fact that we can’t drive on autopilot. We have to wake up and pay attention to what’s going on around us and within us to stay safe.
Fortunately, the newly paved road will feel significantly smoother. You will discover new opportunities, beauty, and adventure, and if you listen to your internal GPS, you will rediscover…you !
So buckle up and drive safely, my friend. Take the scenic route that leads you away from who you aren’t, so you can embrace who you really are. And remember, nothing is ever really taken away from us. It’s simply the universe forcing you to see its lack of value, for you, at this time.
Oftentimes we are so attached to wanting to work with a particular client or be in a relationship with a certain person that we cause ourselves unnecessary pain. As Buddha said, “All suffering comes from attachment.”
A big step in “letting it go” is becoming detached rather than grasping onto a person, job, or situation that we think will make us happy. When we become aware we are behaving this way, we can adjust our thoughts and release expectations. We are all going to fall off the path — that’s a given — but what matters is how quickly we come back to center. Let yourself off the hook.
Choose Stillness
Our willingness to see things differently is everything. When we are willing to choose love instead of fear, peace instead of chaos, and stillness and nonreactivity instead of anger and attack, we will create the space to become more deeply fulfilled people.
When we are triggered, it can be very painful, but it is also a beautiful opportunity to expand and grow into more enlightened people. We do this by disciplining our minds and choosing stillness, peace, love, forgiveness, and compassion even when we feel tempted to judge, blame, criticize, attack, or feel unworthy.
Sometimes that means admitting to ourselves that we are not enlightened enough to not feel angry or insulted, but we are enlightened enough to know not to send that text or email or make a phone call when we are in that place.
The sooner we can acknowledge that life isn’t all about us, and we don’t have to go it alone, the better. We can choose to surrender our thoughts and fears about money, career, family, love, children — you name it — to a power greater than us.
It’s taken me years, but I’ve learned to see feelings as less threatening and more like temporary breezes or storms. As long as we don’t contract and fear our feelings, we stay emotionally flexible so that the storms can pass by quickly.
Whenever we hold on to feelings like anger, judgment, or resentment, we block blessings from flowing to us. So even if you’re not fully ready to surrender your annoyance, for example, try to remember you’re closing yourself off to receiving miracles from the universe, and commit to shifting your perspective. A quick way to do this is to think of someone experiencing a true setback like a cancer diagnosis, the loss of a loved one, or another tragedy.
Instead of wallowing in our wounds and triggers, why don’t we think about the person we wish to be instead? What a perfect opportunity to decide who we want to be and not let outside sources dictate how we feel.
Being annoyed is a great opportunity to practice being the men and women we are capable of being. What a gift! It doesn’t matter who or what annoys us, and it is inevitable we will all be irritated from time to time. What matters is who we choose to be in those frustrating moments. We can choose stillness and nonreactivity.
When we slow down and are still, it is easier to receive divine guidance. We realize the entire universe is set up for our good. So keep your eyes and your heart open. The person, money, opportunity, or experience you desire is on its way or probably standing right next to you. Let your annoyance open you up to new possibilities. I love this beautiful quote from A Course in Miracles: “In my defenselessness my safety lies.”
In every moment, we get to choose who we want to be, and the best part is, we can always change our minds.
Excerpted from the book from The Full Spirit Workout. Copyright ©2021 by Kate Eckman. Printed with permission from New World Library — www.newworldlibrary.com.
