These last couple of years have been rough on many of us, collectively and individually. If you’re feeling a bit drained, depleted or like life has knocked you down and you’re just outright defeated, it’s important to remember that we have choices in life.
We can choose to stay knocked out and give up on our dreams because it feels too hard to stand up again. Or we can choose to feel the feelings of defeat, despair and disappointment AND still have options on how we want to recover and move forward.
Whatever it is that life has thrown your way, whether it’s had to do with the Covid-19 pandemic or not, there are three strategies I learned from martial arts that will help you pick yourself up again with gusto.
As a martial artist, moving through the ranks, from white belt to black belt, you learn to face many different opponents. You’ll learn how to take a hit and feel extreme discomfort. You also learn very early on in your training something called matwork. Matwork is fancy footwork that helps you move quickly to avoid danger coming your way and how to fall down and get back up with ease and velocity.
Similar strategies work in real life. Once you’ve had time to process the hit you’ve taken, consider one of the following strategies to help you get back after life has knocked you down.
1. The Pivot:
On the mat, pivoting looks like moving out of the way of an oncoming assault. It’s a quick change of direction to get you out of harm’s way and possibly set up in a better angle to deliver your counter attack.
In life, when something isn’t working, we sometimes have the option to change direction. We’ve all become masters of the pivot during the past few years. Whether you’ve had to learn to work from home or home school your kids, chances are, you’ve had to change something in your routine that no longer worked.
Are there any other challenges that you’re currently facing that could use a change of direction?
2. Roll with the Punches:
On the mat, martial artists learn how to roll instead of falling flat on their face or straight onto their back. It’s almost as if you brace for the impact by blending with it, tucking yourself into a ball and allowing the backward motion to give you momentum. This momentum helps you reverse the direction of the roll more quickly than if you were laying flat out on the ground. The quicker you roll forward, the easier it is to get your feet underneath you to stand up again with more ease. The more you practice, the easier it becomes.
When life throws you not just one, but a series of hits, learning to roll helps you take a blow and use the momentum of the fall to help you reverse direction and stand back up. If you’re facing financial hardship and get hit with a scary medical diagnosis and are having difficulties in your relationship, life can feel extremely overwhelming. Find support systems, people who have been through similar hardships, and lean on them to walk you through your challenge. Search for groups of people either online or in person who are facing similar challenges. Reach out to your network of friends and acquaintances to find those people. Or enlist the service of a therapist, a counselor or a coach to help support you. Remember, you don’t have to do this alone.
3. Make an Ultimate Comeback:
On the mat, sometimes whether you see it coming or not, you get knocked out for the count. There’s no chance to pivot and rolling is no longer an option. You’re flat out defeated by your opponent. Making an ultimate comeback involves taking the time to recreate yourself and come back even stronger like Rocky Balboa or Madonna.
In life, when you’ve been knocked out for the count, for example, you’ve lost a job, betrayed by a partner or grieving a loved one, and life feels just too hard, remember that you can choose to make an ultimate comeback. Take your time and give yourself grace. When you’re ready, start to imagine and recreate what your life can look like on the other side of this challenge. It may take some out of the box thinking. Perhaps getting trained in a new skill, going back to school, starting your own business or side hustle or getting back out on the dating scene. Create a plan and start taking small action steps toward making that a reality. You got this!